The Illfated School Bus
by TureniAraucasere
Summary: YYH,DBZ,RK,Loz crossover When Link brings Lon Lon Milk onto the school bus, will Yoko be able to survive?
1. The Dangers of Lon Lon Milk

**Man I'm on a roll with these stories! Well, starting an incredibly short, like, 2 chapters, story about wackos on a school bus. What else is new? XD**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, Dragonball/Z/GT, The Legend of Zelda, or Rurouni Kenshin. How rich I would be...**

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Chapter 1:_ The Dangers of Lon Lon Milk_

After a long Friday at school full of the usual monotony, Kuwabara, Keiko, Goku, Chichi, Yoko, Koto, Link, Zelda, Kenshin, and Kaoru rode the school bus home. Wacky things always happen on the bus, but who knows what the consequences are of what Link's about to do.

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"1,000 bottles of Lon Lon Milk on the wall, 1,000 bottles of Lon Lon Milk! Ya take one down, pass it around..." The only person able to bribe Malon into giving him 1,000 bottles of the potent Lon Lon Milk, aka Link, took one out of his hat and passed it around. Yes, his hat. I bet you thought Link carried Deku Seeds, Bombs, and anything else you can think of in a pocket. Tsk tsk. But I digress. "999 bottles of Lon Lon Milk on the wall!" Everyone stared at him with raised eyebrows. "Oh come on guys, drink up! It's on me! Or rather Malon is...but hey! Come on!"

"Well, it's not that I don't want to," Kenshin spoke up sheepishly, "but I'm still kind of hung over from the million that we did yesterda-hic! Whoops. Uh yeah. So, I'd rather not go through that again."

"What?" Kaoru turned to her boyfriend in flames. "You were drunk? You told me you ate something bad from the cafeteria!"

"Well, the hangover wasn't too fun, and vomit is definitely bad. So...I didn't exactly lie..." Kenshin began to edge away.

"Yeah huh, that's lying!"

"Nuh huh!"

"Yeah huh!"

"Nuh huh!"

"Would you two stop it already!" yelled Zelda, holding her throbbing head. "You two can quarrel like a married couple when you get off the bus!"

"Yes ma'am," the two meekly looked down.

"And Link! Nobody wants to drink that Lon Lon Milk after it came out of your hat for crying out loud! And don't think I didn't hear that Malon comment."

Link winced, dreading the consequences that would come when they got home. "Well," he thought, "if I drink enough, it won't hurt." He took off his hat to reach in for more Lon Lon Milk, and all the girls screamed. "What? My hat head can't be that bad!"

The girls looked at each other, Keiko sighed, then said, "Well, it's not that..."

Link began to get frustrated and slapped her. "Spit it out woman!"

Everyone gasped as Keiko turned slowly back to look at the doomed Hylian, her eye twitching. "Nobody slaps me like that, Moldy Milk Hat Wearer!"

"Moldy Milk Hat Wearer! I am deeply offended!" They both leapt at each other, Keiko grabbed his head, and started beating him senseless against the bus side.

"Break it up you idiots!" Yoko intervened. He tried to pull them apart, but they simulaneously kicked him away, where he flew into the bus driver, who knocked his head on the steering wheel. "Ouch! Jerks! Oh...crap. You knocked the bus driver unconscious!"

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**Well, sucks to be them! Lol,please review and tell me if you like it! Thanks!**


	2. All Insanity Ends Somewhere

**Heya guys! The 2nd and final chapter is here! And about twice as long as the other, which I hope you like. Well, here's more insanity! This is dedicated to my friend, nicknamed Link, because our choir teacher was being mean to her, so somehow my other friend, nicknamed Yoko, convinced me, who they call Kenshin, to write the ending. You'll see.**

**PS- I have no idea how to spell eenee meenee, etc. Bear with me.**

**kenji'sgirl-Thank you for reviewing to practically all of my stories!**

**Disclaimer aka The Stuff I Wished I Owned: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, Dragonball Z, The Legend of Zelda, Rurouni Kenshin, or the Lion King.**

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Chapter 2: _All Insanity Ends Somewhere_

"Gaah! You knocked the bus driver unconscious!"

Goku calmly said, "No problem guys! You have to remember, hakuna matata, no worries! Come on sing it with me!"

Everyone stared at Goku, the bus careening out of control, until Chichi screamed, "He drank the milk! Take cover!"

They all dived behind the bus seats as Goku sang, "Hakuna matata, what a wonderful phrase, hakuna matata, ain't no passin' craze! It's our problem-free-."

"Shut up!" Yoko kicked him into the side of the bus, where he lay unconscious. "We need your help, not a musical!"

"You idiot!" Chichi yelled. "He could've gotten us all out of here!"

"Wha'd you call him?" Koto said menacingly.

"Let me spell it out for you." Chichi threw back. "I-d-e-e-o-t."

Koto raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "I figured an old person would know how to spell idiot. But I've overestimated you feeble humans before."

"Hey! I look very good for my age, I'm only 50!"

"You look good for your age? Sister, I'm 615 and I look younger than you!"

"Damn. You could be my great, great, great, great, great-."

"I've heard enough from you!" Koto backhanded Chichi into the side of the bus, where she landed unconscious next to Goku. "Oh yeah. Bullseye. Anyone else want a piece of this?"

"I'd suggest no one want any. It tastes horrible," Yoko whispered.

"I have a volunteer!" Koto pounced on Yoko and began strangling him.

Keiko brought everyone's attention back to their imminent doom. "Uh guys, we're all going to die if we don't do something soon, like, try to drive the bus, maybe."

"I'll save you Keiko!" Kuwabara bounded into action, racing toward the driver's seat, tripping over Link's conveniently placed foot, and finally making it in the seat. "OK, I got it covered." Keiko breathed a sigh of relief. "Eenee meenee meyenee mo, catch a tiger by its toe, uh...what comes next?"

"If he hollers let it go, ow! Zelda!"

"What? I'm letting go because you hollered."

"OK, I know at the rate Kuwabara's going we're not going to live through the next five minutes, but jeez woman, I need my personal space!"

"If he hollers let it go, eenee meenee meyenee mo. OK, that one!" Kuwabara pulled the shift to reverse, causing the bus to abruptly change direction, which caused everyone to fall to the front of the bus, Koto still strangling Yoko.

"I don't know how we've survived this long," Keiko said to herself.

Kenshin picked himself up off of the bus floor and walked to the driver's seat. "Hm. I think it's this one." Of course, he pressed the gas, which made them go even faster backwards, causing all the girls but Koto to scream.

"Sissies." Koto calmly walked to the seat, removed Kenshin, dropped him on Kaoru, just because she hadn't harmed them yet, and slammed on the brake. Yoko went flying out the windshield and got run over by a passing double-decker bus.

Zelda winced. "I'm sorry Koto."

"What? Oh, you think he's dead? Naw, I've hurt him worse than that."

"I'm all right!" Yoko called out while peeling himself off the pavement.

"OK guys, everybody off. Except for you Kenshin, you stay here," Keiko ordered. Being the gentleman he is, he stayed, but after all the stress the bus went through, it blew up. Really, no one noticed.

To this day, Yoko is still paranoid of double-decker buses.

"Double-decker bus!"

"Gyaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

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**Well, I hope you enjoyed that. Our friend Link sure enjoyed Yoko and Kenshin's pain and misery...which makes us wonder...but hey. Oh yes, if you have any ideas for a story with sort of the same humor as this that either you're too lazy to write or for some odd reason you'd like me to write it, just tell me! I know, it's an odd statement, but hey, I'm running out of ideas very quickly. Thanks!**


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